I know I don’t mention to often how my Dyslexia affects my life but its time. I’m sure you all know by now my story of how I was treated horrible by my 4th grade teacher at my old Private school and when my parents tried to advocate for me they threw me out. Well there is a lot more to it than that. I am afraid, almost everyday of my life since then. My teacher did so many bad things to me on a daily bases that I never knew what to expect. She didn’t care what I couldn’t do & was sooo hard on me. She made sure I couldn’t do anything right & made sure I had the papers (school work) to prove it when I came home. Those papers were a constant reminder of everything I wasn’t good at. She Never ever not even once tried to help me! And back then, I used to always ask for help, every day… I needed help so badly but she just didn’t care about me, she wouldn’t help me or let any of the kids help me.
Now, I don’t tell anyone when I need help. I’m afraid they will treat me badly and turn me down like my old teacher always did. I don’t trust anyone, I never leave my parents side. They go every where I go. If I go to baseball practice my parents are the only ones at every practice. I have never gone on a play date ever again since she bullied me. I don’t want to take chances of being treated like that again. I’m scared. I’m not ashamed to say that. Anyone would be after going through what I did.
My Mom thought I should try a camp this Summer. Just a day camp for 2 weeks. I know I couldn’t take my mother with me and this makes me pretty sick just thinking about how bad it could be because I have lived it before for months & months of being bullied by my own teacher in my own classroom & no one to save me not even my head master didn’t care. So now I have to try a camp, my mom told me to choose the activity that I may be interested in. I looked over the website & found one, CSI Forensic Science Camp! Now that sounds interesting. Sounds like something I can do & have fun. Well, at least it started out fun for the first week. We learned finger printing, foot printing, fake blood splatters, ewwww.. And metal detecting & so many other hands on things. Now comes the second week. That’s when the everything became a disaster. The first day I was asked to read a few paragraphs to the class.. I thought, didn’t my mom fill out the questionnaire saying I was severely dyslexic & can read ok but doesn’t understand anything I read, can spell phonetically not great at left & right & a few other things to give a heads up about how I operate. The reading was a disaster, all big scientific words, I stumbled through it. The next day, I was designated “note Taker”.. I don’t take notes, & if I did you would wish I didn’t because you wouldn’t understand them anyway because I write dyslexic. That means I write the way it sounds to me. So “Why” is “Y”.
My parents read Dyslexic but not many people do. Each day I came home I was lower & lower, Sadder & sadder. I told my mom everything. She said she wrote all about me in my camp paperwork & she was going to email them. I told her not to but she doesn’t listen. Remember when she tried to advocate for me at my old school things got worse & worse & then I got kicked out. I didn’t want that to happen again. I just needed help.
The next morning after my mom emailed the camp telling my issues they called her. The man from camp was sooo upset that this happened to me he told my Mom that he would make sure my counselors were told about my dyslexia & my needs. My mom was upset because she said, if you had a Peanut Allergy, they would take that seriously as they should take your LD seriously. The next day things got worse, they said we were going to have to read ballistic reports & write on boards way to much for me! I’m out!! I am not the greatest advocate for myself, I’m working on it. So, what happens is when I don’t speak up & tell the teacher what I’m not great at they just think I can do it & there is where my embarrassment comes in. I’m just to afraid to talk about my weaknesses to anyone because In The past my teacher didn’t care what I said or begged for help so now I just stay quiet.
I’m afraid to get turned down or told, “read it again!” Like she would tell me over & over & she knew I was dyslexic but didn’t care.
I skipped the next day of camp because I was just to scarred to go & get everything wrong. Then my mom made me go the next day. After I got dropped off at camp my mom said she called the head camp director to talk to her about what is going on. Maybe they can’t accommodate kids with LD’s at this camp & it’s not for me. My mom needed to know. We needed to know. My mother said she spoke to the sweetest most kindest understanding woman ever. Nothing like dealing with my old head master. My mom is broken since my old school too because she always hoped they would be kind & understanding but they never ever were, things just got worse & worse. So she is afraid of how people may take her asking for help for me. This woman said,” it is not acceptable for Skys issues to not be taken seriously, she apologized to my mom and to me. She said his LD should be treated as seriously as a peanut allergy! She said she was going to call right now & make sure someone goes over the poster I was going to present at court. I am great at oral presentations & public speaking, I just need help reading over things first. Then I do my thing!
My mom said she cried happy tears while she was on the phone with this kind woman & after she hung up..Someone finally cares, she said. This camp cares & wants to make sure you are treated well & with dignity even though I am only going to be there for 2 weeks. This camp said everything we always prayed my old school would say to us, but Never ever did.
It was wonderful to hear that they wanted to help me & were going to do everything they could to make me feel comfortable!! That is why I must keep trying new things. I’m working hard on it, it’s not easy. But if I don’t try, I will never know who the nice people are & I will only be stuck with my old schools bad memories.
I try everyday to make those memories go away but they sneak back up on me.
I’m fighting hard & won’t stop.
Thank you ESF Camp, thank you for caring about your campers in every way!
I will see you next year!!